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Attachment Parenting as a Whole
What exactly is “Attachment Parenting?”This is a question quick on the lips of those who hear of this “new” trend and while it can’t be labeled as one exact set of standards, there are some common themes for those who believe in this type of parenting.We will give an overview of these things, and provide places to gain further information.
The important thing to keep in mind when researching your own beliefs about parenting is that America has become very mainstream in its way of thinking….Believing that easier and more convenient is better.Unfortunately this way of thinking has crossed over to the parenting community, making parents believe that the easier it is to care for a baby, the better their skills as parents.Having and caring for a baby is the investment of a lifetime.There is nothing so valuable in this world as the relationship you develop with your child. With that in mind, we hope this page is of value to those who already know about attachment parenting and those who are just curious.
Babywearing
One of the most common complaints you hear from new parents is that they have a hard time getting anything done with a new baby in the home.The baby, it seems, wants to be held constantly.What a surprise!! This new little human has been carried for the last 9 months and was quite happy with the arrangement.Old timers will warn you about spoiling your baby, getting him used to being held all the time and will list you all the evils of a baby that can’t be put down.Well if you have had your baby grow inside you or it’s birth mother, like the whole rest of the human race, you already have a “spoiled baby!” While baby wearing might seem trendy here in the good ol US of A, it’s not so new around the globe. For a fun illustration of this, check out this book.
One of the voices of reason on many of the Attachment Parenting concepts is Dr. Sears.He has 8 children on his own and two of them are now doctors, practicing right beside him.He gave me a lot of food for thought on the issues of baby wearing and child discipline!
So why wear your baby? Here’s two sets of reasons!
Psychological Advantages and health advantages
These websites www.kangaroocorner.com andhttp://www.jenrose.com/sling/newsling.htm are chock full of wonderful information about babywearing.
Why do parents choose to wear their babies?Do they like it?Click Here to read about parents like you and how they came to be “babywearers!”
What kind of slings are there? This is the absolute best list we have found! It gives reviews, great descriptions and pros/cons!http://www.jenrose.com/sling/newsling.htm
Where can you find a sling? Slings come in all kinds of different styles and fabrics.When looking for a sling one of the most important things to consider is customer service.You may need some help adjusting the fit, or getting your baby comfortable.One advantage to purchasing from a WAHM making her own slings is getting to choose the fabric that best suits your particular taste and style!Below is a list of those who do custom orders and offer after purchase help with their slings:
List coming soon!Do you make custom slings?Email Susie@diaperdecisions.com to be featured on this list!
Breast Feeding
Breast feeding is one of those issues that really gets people fired up!And it well should.Nature has provided our babies with the most perfect and healthy food for our babies that is always ready, preferred by babies and is free!Unfortunately social stigma (yes it’s a boob, this is what it’s used for!) and the millions of advertising dollars poured out by formula companies has made the decision to breastfeed in this country similar to choosing between vanilla and chocolate ice cream.New moms need to be fully educated not only on the benefits of breastfeeding, but also about the problems that can crop up and the solutions that have helped many mothers overcome their nursing obstacles and successfully breastfeed their children.Formula has it’s place in the world, but make no mistake about it, it is NOTHING like the composition of breast milk and will not nourish your child in the same way.
Breastfeeding has it’s own website full of information.You should spend some time here if you have any questions, concerns or problems during your breast feeding experience.
A voice of reason is essential when starting to breastfeed.This is especially true when you are constantly bombarded with “helpful” advice from Mom, grandma, or friends discouraging you from breastfeeding.Joining your local LLL group can be a real sanity saver!
The FDA surprisingly has a very useful informational page on breastfeeding, including drugs that do/do not pass through mothers breast milk!
Think you’ve got an argument about breastfeeding? Think again!
A pretty stark reality article right here…very sad.
What’s in all that formula anyways?http://www.truthinlabeling.org/formulacopy.html
Want to read lots more info?
http://www.militantbreastfeedingcult.com/index_a.html
http://www.promom.org/bf_info/bfpage.htm
http://www.momobile.org/breastfeeding/empowerment.html
Co-sleeping
After I give birth, one of the first things I look forward to is being able to sleep on my stomach again, after months of back and side sleeping.What I didn’t count on was a baby beside me in the bed!I had all sort of devices to put our baby in…crib, bassinet, swing, and sometimes our little guy would sleep wonderfully in them….But not Mom!After having him so close for so long, it just felt weird sleeping alone.Besides, with nursing every couple of hours, we both got a lot more sleep by being together.When you mention co-sleeping to your mom or other well meaning relative, they sometimes become alarmed, having been subject to the myths surrounding having baby in bed with you.With the following information, you can present a sound argument for the benefits of having baby close to your heart!
Breastfeeding.com has a wonderful article that helps answer some common questions about co-sleeping.
This product is really cool for those who want to co-sleep and need a little extra space!
Is it safe to sleep with your baby?
Your little one enjoy a bedtime story?Check here for a story about your family bed!
Co-sleeping, a personal perspective!
Delayed/Refused Vaccinations
When I first read about the movement for refusing common childhood vaccines, I was appalled. I just brushed it off. After all, I was a *good* mom who dutifully brought my first son to all the well baby check-ups and endured the most horrible part of motherhood: seeing my child poked with a huge needle and crying more than my baby. The nurse assured me, even rubbed me on my back, commending me for being a “good mommy.” I simply could not comprehend that what I had done was not in the best interest of my child. Ironically, we switched our children’s primary care provider because of how the shots were administered at our base facility and this is where our non-vaxing journey began.
I received a homeschool magazine one day and there was a horrible article outlining what is actually in vaccines, how they are made and what they are known to do. Luckily, my little girls 18 month well baby check up was right around the corner, and I had every intention of showing our family doctor this horrible article, confident she would dismiss it all as hogwash and ease my conscience a bit.
That day changed my life in a way I never expected. My wonderful family doctor, a mother of two young children herself, sat with our family for close to an hour. She explained that vaccinations were a hot topic right now and that she had a great deal of her clientele in the “non vaxing” arena. I was shocked as she explained that what I had read in the article was all truth and that vaccines had been manufactured in this way for a long time. She gave it to us straight, and for this I will always be thankful. Many doctors know this information, but honestly believe that the worse of the two evils is not using the vaccines, regardless of the risks and the way they are manufactured.
I will never put anyone down for choosing one way or the other.What I do beg parents to do, is to have ALL the facts before making the decisions to inject your child with disease and toxins that are not necessary.Spend some time reading about this issue before deciding one way or the other.I firmly believe it does not good to make a decision based on emotion, as very often you will have to defend that decision and it needs to be done intelligently and calmly.It you are already a family that does refused/delayed vaccinations, we have some helpful links for you to have handy for defending your decision legally.You do NOT have to vaccinate, regardless of what you are told.
I was thrilled to receive this pamphlet in the mail when I got my order from Diaper Cuts.Beth is wonderful for using her small business to distribute information!
We have used this affidavit
to claim exemption for religious reasons.You can replace the state
Does religious exemption mean you have to belong to a church?No!
Basic Facts to Know About Vaccinations
What do people of importance say about vaccinations?Everyone has an opinion!These are some expressed in a view that vaccinations are harmful!
Facts, fact and more facts:
http://www.vaccinationdebate.com/web4.html
Cloth Diapering
There are several reasons why people choose to cloth diaper, and for whatever reason gets you on the bandwagon, you quickly realize the other benefits as well.The main reasons people cloth diaper are:
- To save money
- For the sake of baby’s health
- For the environment
- Because they are cute!
The stuff inside a disposable diaper is just gross, plain and simple.Then you think, they are designed to hold lots and lots of moisture…so basically they are designed to be urinated in over, and over, and over again.You really think your baby is comfortable like this?A disposable diaper contains a fluffy material that is super absorbent. If you cut open the diaper you will see a soft materials like this:
Not too bad?Well, that fluffy stuff gets really, really gross when it gets wet.Take a look!
This “fluff” when wet becomes a nasty, sticky, gelatinous goo.When snapping these pictures, we used koolaid instead of plain water to accentuate the texture of the gel.It was sticky and it was cold.The sad part is there is only a very thin layer of paper between this and your baby! Take a look!
There are MANY reasons to cloth diaper your baby, but a picture is worth a thousand words.Our whole site is geared towards promoting cloth diapers.If you want to give it a try, we have a package designed to help you make the best decision for your family and if you are looking for a local cloth diaper store, check out our directory.
Gentle Discipline
Most of the debate surrounding the issue of discipline centers around one issue: To spank or not to spank.I would like to say that this really isn’t the first issue to consider when forming your own philosophy about discipline.I feel that the first and foremost issue is your own feelings toward your child and your role in their upbringing.
Are you a friend, teacher, soley a disciplinarian?As a Christian I have seen both sides of the spanking/not spanking debate, and my opinions on this matter have been largely formed by the very intelligent and common sense arguments against physical discipline.As I saw written on one chat board, anything that tells you that there is a certain method for raising “good kids” should be viewed with suspicion.There is not a box method for helping your child develop into the person they are going to be.Hiding behind a religion, a book, or a class that teaches otherwise isn’t a wise idea.Your child is YOUR child and it is the most important relationship you will ever have.No matter how many relationships you are involved in, in your lifetime, you will never have the same impact on anyone as you do your child!They are little people, new to this planet and need patience, guidance and understanding.
The best thing about attachment parenting is the sheer amount of time you spend with your child, alleviating many of the discipline problems encountered by most parents.If you are right there with your child, you can simply guide them in what they are doing wrong and correct it without delay.There doesn’t always have to be a certain consequence other than the consequence itself.Below are some links to explain the philosophy of gently discipline and all it encompasses!
Some very heartwrenching food for thought.
Are you a Christian? Been taught that you MUST spank?Check out these articles!
http://skylane.kjsl.com/%7Elindav/notrain.htm
http://www.parentingdecisions.com/sufferthelittlechildren7.htm
http://www.unhinderedliving.com/discipline.html
I had heard of Ezzo and instinctively knew I would not be interested in reading any more about their methods. However, I stumbled across this link and was horrified. Everyone should read this! http://www.ezzo.info/Voices/hfamily.htm
http://www.ezzo.info/Voices/journey.htm
How to Discipline?Dr. Sears has several articles that provide ways to put into action the idea of gently discipline!
Homeschooling
Homeschooling comes as a natural extension of the Attachment Parenting lifestyle.Some do, some do not.Homeschooling can be easily mistaken for “school at home” in which most parents say “I don’t have the patience.”Patience has nothing to do with it.The teacher in your public classroom does not have a degree in patience and they certainly don’t have the same feelings towards you child that you do.
So the question reallybecomes, do you WANT your child with you day to day?It can be daunting, the thought of taking on your child’s education, but this movement is growing by leaps and bounds and is redefining itself every day!There are many reasons people choose to homeschool and we will briefly outline a few of them:
- Quality of education - The test scores coming from public schools verses homeschools cannot be denied or ignored.Homeschooled children are not prodigies; they are simply beneficiaries of customized education.They work at their own pace, learn more in depth things that hold their interest and have more one on one with those instructing them.They are also (contrary to myth) better socialized because their exposure and interaction with people is not limited to one adult and 25 children within nine months of their own age. (www.madrone.com/Home-ed/hs11.htm , www.fee.org/vnews.php?nid=2846 )
- Limiting peer dependence - This is not the same as isolation or backwardness among home schooled children.This is an issue of having your child respect and listen to those in his own age group rather than those who actually have something of value to convey.Very often once a child starts school, they will only respect those who are their same age.The disadvantage comes into play when suddenly their younger sibling isn’t “cool” anymore and not worthy of the youngster’s time and attention.Parents suddenly become “stupid” and don’t know anything.You have heard it before! Peer dependence is not healthy and is the leading cause of children falling into unwanted behaviors such as experimenting with drugs and alcohol, participating in illegal activity and becoming sexually active at a very young age.www.hsc.org/professionals/socialization.php
- Safety - It’s not news…most parents have a small amount of fear sending their child off to school, especially as their children get older!Some used to call this fear unfounded, yet with the rash of school shootings…happening in places that have shocked us all, you can’t help but agree: Schools are not what they used to be!www.cnn.com/SPECIALS/1998/schools/
- Convenience - If your family is not the “norm” and you have a funky schedule, homeschooling is one way to preserve important family relationships! For example, one friend of mine’s husband works from 3 in the afternoon to 11 at night.If her children were in public school they would never see their father!They work their schedule around dad’s and they are able to spend time together as a family!This can work for a family who travels frequently, those who have a harvest time, or who prefer a more broken up school schedule (such as 4 weeks on, 1 off…or 4 days a week, with Friday being an errand day, so on and so forth!)
When you start to research homeschooling, it can become very overwhelming very fast.You will read about teaching styles, learning styles, curriculum, methods, philosophies, scheduling, and the list goes on.This is a very comprehensive guide to everything homeschooling.Just read a little at a time as you start to absorb homeschooling and all it entails!
One of my favorite places to watch homeschooling conversations and to pick up used books and supplies is www.vegsource.com/homeschool.